These 5 Mistakes Will Ruin Your LLM Personal Statement Forever

Introduction

One of the most critical components of an LL.M. application is the personal statement. This essay is your opportunity to talk about your past, present, and plans for the future. It’s one of the most important documents in your application because it’s the one you have the most control over. More importantly, it’s often the only place where your unique voice can truly shine.

While other documents—such as your CV, letters of recommendation, and transcripts—provide a broader picture of your qualifications, the personal statement gives the admissions committee an insight into who you are, what you stand for, and your personal values and philosophy.

For many applicants, writing a personal statement is also one of the most challenging parts of the process—and it certainly was for me. Before applying for my master’s degree, I had extensive experience writing motivation letters for summer schools, internships, and exchange programs. However, those letters were more straightforward, focusing on summarizing my professional development and reasons for applying. Writing a personal statement for a master’s program is a different beast altogether.

It requires articulating your long-term career goals, connecting them to your professional background and the program you’ve chosen, and demonstrating a high degree of self-awareness. When I first started working on my LL.M. applications, I was overwhelmed.

I scoured the internet for examples of personal statements, regardless of whether they were for college, MBA, or Ph.D. programs (see my recommendations here; I also published a selection of my letters online). I didn’t just read them—I analyzed them, saved phrases I liked, and made notes on effective storytelling techniques. I did multiple brainstorming sessions to surface memories from my past, insights about my present, and plans for the future.

Eventually, my hard work paid off. By the end of the application cycle, I received offers from the University of Cambridge, the Geneva Institute for International Dispute Settlement (MIDS), New York University School of Law, and Harvard Law School.

It took me a while to write a decent personal statement but in the end I think I succeeded (more on that here). By the end of the application cycle, I had acceptances from the University of Cambridge, the Geneva Center for International Dispute Settlement (probably one of the best dispute resolution programs out there), the New York University School of Law, and Harvard Law School.

Since then, I’ve reviewed countless personal statements for friends, colleagues, and mentees. Along the way, I’ve noticed recurring mistakes that can hold applicants back. I’ve already written about the importance of crafting a strong personal statement, as well as its hidden benefits for building your confidence and clarity. In this post, I share the top pitfalls to avoid when crafting your personal statement.

Let's dive in.

Mistake 1: Restating Your CV

Personal statement is a place to talk about things that the admissions committee will not be able to learn from other parts of your application. It's not a place to regurgitate your CV. Instead, it’s an opportunity to provide information that isn’t covered elsewhere in your application. This could include the motivations behind your chosen program, the formative moments in your professional or personal journey, your long-term goals, and how the degree aligns with your aspirations.

Restating what’s already in your CV not only wastes valuable space but can also come across as lazy. Admissions committees may interpret it as a lack of effort or genuine interest in the program. Use the personal statement to demonstrate self-awareness and articulate your vision for the future.

Mistake 2: focusing on Your Field, Trauma, or Someone Else

A personal statement should center on you and your journey. While it’s common to reference your field of study, personal challenges, or influential people in your life, these should never overshadow your narrative.

For example, early in my journey, I mistakenly wrote an essay that was more about the importance of law in society than about myself. Unsurprisingly, it was unsuccessful. Similarly, dwelling excessively on personal trauma can make your essay one-dimensional. Instead, focus on how you overcame challenges, what you learned, and how those experiences shaped your aspirations.

If you write about someone who inspired you, ensure the focus remains on how their influence connects to your personal growth and ambitions. The admissions committee wants to learn about you, not someone else.

Mistake 3: Using clichés

Avoid using clichés. According to Oxford Dictionary, a cliché is "a phrase or opinion that is overused and betrays a lack of original thought."

Examples of clichés in personal statements are:

"I am the culmination of my experiences"

"I have always wanted to become a lawyer/doctor/XYZ"

"From a young age I have felt passionate about/have been fascinated by..."

"My life has been a journey"

"As long as I can remember..."

"My love of astronomy began when I did X/Y/Z..."

"Ever since I was young"

These statements are way too general. They apply virtually to everybody, and as a consequence don't really mean anything. They are so overused that they don't really say anything about you to the admissions committee.

I know that sometimes it's not that easy to recognize a cliché as such, especially if you are not a native English speaker. In that case, as a rule of thumb, try to avoid generalized statements that don't move your argument forward and don't communicate valuable information about you to the admissions committee. Instead, aim for specificity. Share details and insights that highlight your individuality and connect directly to your goals.

Mistake 4: Lacking Specificity and Evidence

The old adage "show, don’t tell" applies here. Instead of making abstract claims about your qualities, provide concrete examples.

For instance, rather than saying, "I’m a hard worker," describe a specific challenge you overcame or an achievement that demonstrates your work ethic, eg winning a regional or national competition. By giving the admissions committee evidence, you allow them to draw conclusions about your strengths on their own.

Similarly, instead of just saying that you are a team player, tell about the time you were in charge of a group of 10 people and led them to success. Give specific details.

Generally, for each attribute that you claim to have in your personal statement, give your readers a reason to believe you, an evidence, a specific detail, and the readers will make the conclusions for themselves.

Mistake 5: Failing to Proofread

When you are done with your draft personal statement, proofread it thoroughly. Proofread multiple times. Print it out and proofread. As an author, you are bound to miss your own mistakes, so ask a friend to read it. Ask a colleague to read it. Take proofreading very seriously.

"Proofread as if your life depended on it because in admissions it does." (c) A.V. Gordon

The admissions committee has zero tolerance to mistakes and errors. If you submit a personal statement with typos, they will assume that if you could not be bothered to proofread your essay properly, maybe you just don't want it to be admitted that much.

BONUS Mistake 6: Trying to Be Someone you're not

One common misconception is that you need to fit a specific mold to be admitted. The truth is, admissions committees value authenticity. They aren’t looking for a particular “type” of applicant—they’re looking for individuals who are self-aware, reflective, and passionate about their goals.

Instead of trying to conform to an imagined ideal, focus on presenting your true self. Reflect deeply on your experiences, values, and aspirations, and communicate them honestly.

Personal statement is an exercise in self-analysis, and this is what you need to show. It does not matter what profile you have; what matters is how well you know yourself and how you present it to the admissions committee.

Final Thoughts

If you'd like to learn more about how to write a winning LLM personal statement, you can check out my three-part series on this subject: Part 1, Part 2 and Part 3. It's an illustration of my original 5-step methodology for writing personal statements. The core of this methodology is identifying and focusing on formative life experiences to craft a compelling LL.M. application. In this post I explain how I strategically chose what experiences to include and what to leave out. You can also read about my philosophy on using personal stories, as opposed to professional, here (the overarching framework) and here (how I applied it to my Harvard essay). For the essay on a legal issue (Harvard's personal statement, part 'b') or a writing sample, please check out this post.